Saturday, August 29, 2009

The 10 Rich Bitch rules to live by!













So by now you must be wondering "What in the world is a Rich Bitch?" No worries, yours truly is here to fill you in. Pay attention!

The definition of Rich Bitch is: A chick usually young who got lots of dough , usually over 6 figures and flaunts it. ( A girl who flaunts money, cars, status etc.)

I don't necessarily flaunt anything. It's just ME. I can't help that I wear designer clothes, drive a car that cost in the 6 figures and have the phone numbers of Hollywood's A-list in my little black book. I don't have Rich Bitch written on my forehead, but I guess I look the part. So sue me!
I wasn't born rich, I used to be that girl working a 9-5 dead end job, going nowhere fast. I did a complete 360 and you won't even recognize me now. I made a choice and it paid off big time. Hey, I paid my dues... I was married to two men almost old enough to be my father... I got promoted from being a dreamer to a Gold digger to a Rich Bitch. Call it what you want. All I know is that right now I'm living the good life. No boss to answer to, no money worries, no deadlines, no schedules. I am my own boss, I run this Rich Bitch Inc.

The word Rich Bitch may sound harsh to you. In the 'land' of Hollywood it's not interpreted that way. I only call myself a Rich Bitch because you gave me that name. See, if you met me, the first thing you would say is "look at that Rich Bitch". I've been you, I've been there, I've said that. I used to envy on girls living that carefree life.

Being a Rich Bitch comes with some rules. (I had to learn the hard way. Through my marriages to 'sugar daddies' I've met a lot of professional Rich Bitches, if you want to call them that. They taught me the ins and outs).

Here are the Rich Bitch rules to live by:
  1. Always look groomed, even when going to the gym. (Speaking of which, sweating in the gym is a no-no. You don't want your make up to run and your hair to frizz. Just look good in your cute outfit. Do your real workout at your home gym, behind closed doors. You have to keep in shape).
  2. Weekly or bi-weekly mani-pedi's are mandatory. This is not optional. I usually go for a red nail or a neutral color. Those usually match all my outfits. Chips and broken nails mean you have to either switch salons or make more trips to the salon...Heck, just get rid of the loser!
  3. Get your hair done twice a month or as necessary. It all depends on what events you are attending. Never mess with your hair yourself, leave it to the pro. (Extensions are acceptable, but only if they are invisible. No Britney's here!)
  4. Facials and massages depend on skin type. I get mine done weekly. Love going to the spa. What's a girl to do, I love being pampered. (Alert! You only go to a high end Spa, this is your skin you are talking about. You don't want amateurs to touch it!)
  5. Botox is a must for those lines on your forehead that you pretend not to see. Some filler under your eyelids will make you look well rested and collagen works wonders on those skinny lips. As for breasts, when in doubt, go bigger.
  6. Make sure you wear brand name clothes. If not, combining non brand name jeans with a designer top and a designer bag will work too. However, don't half-ass it. The only non-designer item I own are some socks that I really need to lose fast. Flip-Flops? Fashion don't! In Europe, where all the good fashion comes from nobody wears flip flops. They are considered pool or at home slippers. So unless the flip flops say Jimmy Choo or another major brand, don't wear them.
  7. Never eat in public. Calorie rich (fattening) meals that is. Rich Bitches are always watched by admiring wanna be's. Always order a salad and nibble on it.When you get home hungry, that's when you eat. Also, you don't cook or clean. There are people for that. Don't make them lose their job. Contribute, hire a cook and a cleaning lady. (You can also go for a meal delivery service).
  8. Never interact with people that aren't 'hot'. (Show me your friends and I'll tell you who you are). If your friend's a loser...What does that make you? 'nuff said. Rich Bitches only date rich men. If he's rich and famous you've hit the jackpot. Keep up with all the gossip (TMZ rules, even in rich man land). Make sure you know which celeb is hot and whose not!
  9. If you have to 'party' go to the hottest clubs. Usually this is where all the good looking, popular people and celebrities hang out. Don't go clubbing too much, people will get sick of you. Don't smoke, it's gross (nobody likes kissing an ashtray). If you drink, only drink one glass of the best champagne and/or wine.
  10. Never pay cash. Status is everything. Show off that Black Visa Card and don't penny pinch. Have a stack of at least $20 bills on hand to tip valet service when by yourself. You don't want to be cheap, you have a reputation to keep up. On another note, never pay for breakfast, lunch or dinner. Make sure your date pays.
Now you know the 10 rules to live by. Being a Rich Bitch is hard work but tonz of fun too. This weekend I'm going to private celebrity party at a rented mansion on Mulholland Drive. Should be fun. I will spill the details as much as I can. Why you ask? Maybe because I used to be you. I used to read about the glam life of celebrities and other Rich Bitches and wanted that too. I wanted to see what it was like and now I'm living it. I did it my way.

Well wanna be's, It's getting late, gotta get that beauty sleep. I'll post more soon.

Diamonds & Dollars,

Rich Bitch in Hollywood

4 comments:

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    You get paid for the same stuff that you do in your blog and there are lots of daily,weekly and monthly prizes at stake.
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  2. well i like your blog and hope to visit it from time to time .Thnaks

    ReplyDelete
  3. lol! I like your blog and it sure seems cool to be a rich bitch keep up!


    Billie http://spuriousphilosopher.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wow.. I dont think ill ever be like you. I give you mad props!

    ReplyDelete

 
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